Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Randomize
