just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
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Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
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Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT