Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
