They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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