If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
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