He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
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