Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
