I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
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Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
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I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
do nipples grow back?
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