So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Randomize