I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
