I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
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