did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
When did angry sex become our thing?
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize