I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
