you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I need water and some morals
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
