Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
