Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Randomize