it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
party gras won. party gras always wins.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
