We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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