i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
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