There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
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