ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
