We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
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