You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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