Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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