We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
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