I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Randomize
