last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize