If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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