if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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