When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
