my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
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i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
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Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
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