First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
