scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
