So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
