Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
