i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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