seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
