Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I am naked and annoyed.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize