Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
