So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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