Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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