This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
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Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
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We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
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