Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
