You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
vagina is talking i cant
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
