He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize