Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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