youre lurking in front of me
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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