Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(443): View more from Maryland

Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.

Fav 35 4997 944
share tweet
(518): View more from New York

You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window

Fav 14 3536 799
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(502): View more from Kentucky

Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.

Fav 6 1187 3185
share tweet
(216): View more from Ohio

somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.

Fav 17 9407 1437
share tweet
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(703): View more from Virginia

I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.

Fav 22 1166 9019
share tweet
(403): View more from Alberta, CA

The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital

Fav 4 3372 1775
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(425): View more from Washington

Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.

Fav 20 3275 1569
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(402): View more from Nebraska

I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking

Fav 0 906 625
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(425): View more from Washington

Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.

Fav 1 68 9
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT