ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
Heading there now. Already have a boner.