Texts From Last Night

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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Fuck I'm high.

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  (908): Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles. (908): Fuck I'm high. http://tfl.nu/titc
  Replies (56) Good night (1711) Bad night (3399)
• Favorite

  (681): View more from West Virginia

  Where are I am going home with Ryan

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it

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  (681): Where are I am going home with Ryan (601): I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it http://tfl.nu/l22z
  Replies (19) Good night (1839) Bad night (2478)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Fuck appropriateness.

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  (301): Fuck appropriateness. http://tfl.nu/83xq
  Replies (17) Good night (5998) Bad night (675)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.

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  (713): I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke. http://tfl.nu/gwfs
  Replies (14) Good night (5098) Bad night (744)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....

  (614): View more from Ohio

  We've got ourselves a situation

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  (614): Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and.... (614): We've got ourselves a situation http://tfl.nu/efwe
  Replies (51) Good night (7159) Bad night (730)
• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it

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  (650): I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it http://tfl.nu/nnzm
  Replies (15) Good night (1143) Bad night (3806)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia

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  (978): I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia http://tfl.nu/pfmm
  Replies (9) Good night (4628) Bad night (900)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.

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  (914): I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here. http://tfl.nu/s43y
  Replies (15) Good night (4888) Bad night (1230)
• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.

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  (504): Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine. http://tfl.nu/uqy7
  Replies (13) Good night (2127) Bad night (2628)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.

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  (313): We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love. http://tfl.nu/ypzc
  Replies (5) Good night (4319) Bad night (834)
• Favorite

  (660): View more from Missouri

  We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out

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  (660): We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out http://tfl.nu/p80s
  Replies (3) Good night (5290) Bad night (1123)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.

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  (302): Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself. http://tfl.nu/ycey
  Replies (8) Good night (3466) Bad night (1000)
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.

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  (312): Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees. http://tfl.nu/fk9m
  Replies (5) Good night (2443) Bad night (651)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.

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  (+44): One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend. http://tfl.nu/kcdy
  Replies (12) Good night (2463) Bad night (587)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.

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  (817): Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence. http://tfl.nu/yx0o
  Replies (4) Good night (2012) Bad night (442)

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