I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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