If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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